And All For Racquetballs

Excerpt from "Worst Case Scenario" by Angela at The Ashtray:

I should stop here and note that I've been fired exactly twice. Once for being the poster child for nepotism (or completely and openly insulting an elected official of the city where I worked, either way you look at it), and once from Wal-Mart, where I worked for five weeks when I was 17. I got shitcanned for saying over the storewide intercom (in my gorgeous, sultry, 1-900 voice) "I have a customer by the balls in toys who needs assistance," and then repeating for clarity, "I have a customer by the balls in toys who needs assistance. Thank you." Before I'd hung up the little intercom phone, the manager had already turned out my register light.